How "Opinions" Lead to Judgement

Ahh yes, it is time for this post: the problem with opinions. We've all heard that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and as far as I can reason that assessment seems, well reasonable. But there does come a point though when opinions can easily go astray and become judgments and that's something that plagues my generation especially. How do you objectively judge something? Is it even possible? Keep in mind, what you think is great others my argue is utter trash and what you find entirely unappealing, others find entertaining. Is it offensive to say "that movie sucks" when someone else really enjoyed it and furthermore if everything is subjective and quality truly lies in the eye of the beholder, then does that mean that there is no scale to which we could rank what's "good" and what's "bad"? This is something I've debated much in my head because I too am guilty for passing judgment on other people's pleasures. I'm quick to say that something is stupid or immature really only because to me it seems that way but if confronted about my own hobbies or interests I'm just as quick to reply that mine actually have legitimacy and are normal (which is a whole nother can of worms). But I also refuse to accept that certain things aren't silly or abnormal - I mean if my hobbies is to run around in a red cape and eat worms I really don't believe I have any basis upon which to argue that I'm not weird. Assuming we can all agree that that's weird, then we have passed judgment - hence the crux of my problem, where do we draw the line?

If we choose to live in a world where we can simply dismiss each others feelings and cast judgment left and right then there really isn't much of a problem at all but what happens when that very same judgment is cast among friends or someone you love. Yeah, Houston we've got a problem. You see, its easy to challenge someone you don't know and don't really have any solid connection to - unless you're like mother Teresa and you can't offend anyone. I was in the car the other day with two friends and I asked where we should go eat. One friend suggested Chili's and then the other friend said no way Jose because she didn't like it. Ahh here we go - classic example. To me, both are correct in what they did - James suggested a place he enjoys and figured maybe others would and Eryka rejected it because she figured there were better places we could go to. From both angles one could argue about who is "right"; James in Eryka's opinion suggested an unappealing place and Eryka in James' opinion was not right is abruptly dismissing what he believed to be a good place. To be honest, I can't see a way out of this dilemma because Eryka shouldn't be forced to do something she really doesn't want to but James on the other hand shouldn't feel as though his choices are undesirable. What exacerbate this problem even more: they both care about one another and neither wants to hurt the feelings of the other (well they're actually engaged so more reason). I simply don't know what one should do, save one option: don't express your opinion then.

But is that really the right way? Censoring someone's opinions because it may or may not cause conflict? That seems like the wrong answer and all it might do is stymie people's conversations or input. In the end perhaps the best method is to do the old "agree to disagree" - and if you're in the presence of people who you know are going to disagree with your assessment then try to be more gentle or understanding about how you go about expressing your opinion. For example, some like the slapstick kind of comedy that's popular now - I detest it, with a passion. If that person tells me he saw a trailer for a movie, or saw the movie itself, and thought it was hilarious I'm going to apply my new mentality towards judgment. It would be impossible for me not to judge because I'm human, and Spanish. So instead of reverting to the older more critical version of myself and saying "that's not funny, its stupid and you must be stupid too for liking it" I'm going to simply say, that's not my style but I'm glad you like it and enjoy it. Likewise, I expect (or at least hope) people would do the same for me. I like horror movies and instead of someone saying that they're stupid and dumb and why would people pay money to see that shit - I hope they would tell me that its not really their thing but they're glad I find it appealing, or in the least ask me why I like it instead of dismissing it so bluntly. Now, once you're among like-minded people are you share the same opinion, perhaps then you can be a little more critical without sounding offensive and more importantly without making the ones you care about feel well, like crap. Its a small step, but sometimes enough small steps can make one giant leap...for mankind ;-)

Mornings....suck

You know, for being a self-proclaimed "morning person" my mornings really suck. I'm usually woken up too early - as in before 7 am early (I'm a 21 year old former -ouch- student, that's early for us). The first thing I hear every morning is usually my father angrily screaming about the house in a deranged fashion - certainly not pleasant and not the "good morning" most kids hear and that's quickly followed by the nagging/barking of my dogs, or my parents forgetting to turn of their alarm, or the fucking people cutting grass at all hours of the morning. Lest I forget, once I'm woken up, I can't go back to sleep so its hello shitty new day and goodbye awful last night's sleep. Yes my morning's suck - perhaps I should be a night owl instead.

Ten Pictures: Key Biscayne Fishing Trip

These are my 10 photos from the trip. In each I saw something that excited me, and for those reasons i decided to edit them and post them. For some its the action or the movement, for others its the fading or the light. I like the poses for a couple and the colors for more. And then of course I like them for the story they can tell, like this last one. I can feel Hemingway, or I can see Jaws. I smell the salt in the air and I can hear the ocean faintly when I look at this picture. My mind wanders, my imagination takes float and my possibilities become endless. A little creativity and a lot of imagination can be a potent & exciting mixture.

The Twilight Saga - Everyone's got an Opinion

Today I finished Breaking Dawn, the fourth installment in the Twilight series. For the past two years I spent countless hours immersing myself in Stephanie Meyer's compelling saga and found myself wrapped up in a world of vampires and werewolves, Edwards and Jacobs, and of course - Bella. Her series is more than just a teenage romp; in my opinion it is a masterful patchwork of life inspired decisions, choices and consequences that any reader can instantly relate to. Whether it's Bella's paralyzing depression, her obsession over Edward or the choice one must make when a heart is torn between two, Twilight manages to truly communicate to people on a level I have not witnessed since the boy wizard himself. When I read the book, I felt as though Bella were speaking my language; as though she was the one person who understood exactly how I felt (I was in a dark place for four years) and every experience she underwent mimicked my life in a shocking but oh so gripping manner. I was Bella, maybe not with the whole obsession over Edward, but I too pined for things in my life and I too was given a taste of bliss and forced to be torn away from it. I understood her depression and desire to inflict upon herself just the slightest bit of pain to realize that I was still alive! Twilight is also an epic love story: what happens when you feel like you're not good enough (I've been a long time member of that club) and then suddenly, someone you never though would even notice you can't stand to be without you. What decisions will you make and are you ready to bite down on the consequences of you actions - no matter how natural or strong you feel the urge. Stephanie constructed a world rich in fantasy but shockingly close to reality and that deserves some credit.

One more thing: perhaps people have not noticed but the book is a little more deep than just vampires and werewolves. Believe it or not, the whole story is a metaphor for sex and the risks and consequences kids face if they choose to engage in it. Yes, the movies (and books to an extent) are sexually charged and no one can deny the sexual tensions rippling through the audiences who faithfully storm the theaters to view provacative shirtless scenes of their idols- but the actual message is one of abstinence. Perhaps I ought to explain if you're still in doubt. In the novel, sex is subtly mentioned as the central tension in Bella and Edward (and Jacob's) relationship. Edward, in all his "beauty" (rolling my eyes) is captivating to Bella and physically, her scent and blood are equally as tantalizing for Edward. Both flirt with their sexual tension, kissing, embracing and even perhaps spooning yet both are fully aware of what will happen if they give into their real urges: Edward will lose control of his emotions and end up killing Bella. Ok, so lets rewind here and explain. The fact that Bella will die if they give in is a metaphor for the consequences of sex: giving into temptation brings about a whole world of risks and troubles which range from STDs to pregnancies. Stephanie Meyer, echoing her Mormon roots attempts to relate Bella's desires for Edward to any real life teenager's desires to also engage in sex and using the vampire metaphor, has constructed a situation in which teens who wish to abstain can relate to Bella's angst but find the strength to wait until marriage (like Bella and Edward do). Only until marriage can one fully find the strength to have sex and only in marriage were Bella and Edward able to fully trust and complete each other (literally). Even Bella's fears that she will be a different person, wild and unpredictable, when she becomes a vampire (loses her virginity) are reminiscent of real people's concerns that "sex changes everything". Meyer has also has used Edward as a metaphor for teens to relate to the all to real situation of: I know they're bad for me but I can't help it, I love them! Many kids struggle with their parents condemnation of their partner but would rather suffer through the struggles because their significant other is well, significant. Jacob too plays a central role in this as he acts as the good influence, the person your parents think ought to be in your life. While the Jacob in the book isn't exactly a square, he does have one thing on Edward: he can actually give Bella a more normal life and thus is the complication in her relationship. Bella eventually develops feelings for him too (how many people develop feelings for another while in relationship.....yeah exactly) and becomes even more conflicted. Or take it on a more basic level: what do you do when you rely on your friends and need them to get through life but your definition of "friendship" and theirs don't coincide.

Bella is selfish, conflicted, emotional and makes the wrong choices - just like most of her readers. For many of us Twilight readers, Bella and the other characters are as real as the people in our lives and their struggles provide an outlet for a troubled person who feels isolated and confused.

Twilight has found a way to intimately touch to the lives of millions - including mine. That's enough for me to give it the thumbs up.

I Like People...

I like people. Not so much meeting them, although that can be enjoyable, but I prefer to see them. Photographs especially. I like seeing people in photographs. When I see someone's picture and it catches my eye, I begin to hum a quiet tune in my head. Something I heard in a movie, or a trailer, long ago but I seem to have forgotten where. But there I go, quietly humming inside my head and slowly allowing myself to be whisked off by the picture. Its almost an out of body experience except its my mind, it breaks free of the confines of my skull and swirls above me floating on that sweet tune. I can stare, and stare, and stare - all day long perhaps at the photo and still remain riveted. I can't explain it any better than that, I simply become mesmerized or entranced.

But there's more....

I don't simply appreciate the people in the photograph, in fact their appearance has not much to with its charm. Its their movement that captivates me. Even though its a still frame, I swear I can see them moving! And i'm not just talking about in the photo either. They escape the four corners and I watch them dance around - they too are shrouded by my sweet tune and soon there is a harmonious blend between picture and mind, reality and imagination. I love to see how their arms bend, how their legs dangle. I want to visualize the rush they feel when leaping or running. I want to feel the warmth of people's hands as they glide across a surface and I want to distinguish the textures beneath their skin. Movement captivates me thoroughly. I can also feel their moods too, the mild swaying evokes melancholy while their upward eyes and squared shoulders inspires pride and confidence in me. A photograph for me is much more than a still frame, its a living memory which comes alive at the touch and envelopes me in its imagery. A photograph is something special, but one with movement is something magical.

And there goes I go again, humming that sweet tune....

Treading These Familiar Waters....again.

So here I am, treading these familiar waters once again. I started this blog in 2008, partly as an attempt to be cool and "have" a blog but also in part because I did actually have ideas I believed merited a post every now and then. Yet as inevitable as the setting of the sun, my blog fell into neglect, forsaken ideas suspended in time - viewable to all but actually viewed by, well no one. I can hardly blame people for not being the slightest bit interested, after all the whole idea of a blog just a tad obnoxious. Besides, who doesn't hope to acquire a limited but loyal following who actually parcel out time to read about your excitement or happiness (in my case, usually the lack there of). Yet sadly, my initial enthusiasm soon faded and like all the previous blogs I had, this one bit the dust too. However something happened since my last (awful) blog post. I realized that a blog can be just as cathartic as it can be narcissistic. Its almost like the journal I never had, sans the little leather bound book and sacred pen that one usually associates with nostalgic journal keeping. Once I heard a singer say that, as selfish as it sounded, she didn't write and sing songs for her fans - the truth was that they were for herself. If people enjoyed them, well then that's great but if they didn't, oh well. I've decided that's the approach I'm taking to this reincarnation of my blog. Gone will be my introductions, or my semi-rant about what I will write about or what you should expect.
Just read it,
if you want ;-)

The Whore With A Heart

Recently, my good friend wrote a blog post about her pet dog Tina, who sadly has been deceased for many years now. It was really incredible - and it inspired me to write a post about my female dog. For the past roughly 5 years now, i have grown up with a dog - a male dog - named Hunter and he was in all honesty my best friend. We rescued him after he was abandoned by a series of owners (about 6 or 7 in total according to the same vet who treated him) and it was perhaps the greatest decision of our lives in my opinion. He has proven to be everything we ever wanted out a dog - unshakably loyal, dutiful, fiercely intelligent, kind, loving and reliable, not to mention very (maybe even a little excessively) overprotective. And while I was perfectly content with the him, apparently my father wasn't. So sometime last April, in what was a spur of the moment decision (literally), my mom and dad purchased another dog from some viejo roof repairman - she was 10 months old. Apparently, she was heavily abused as well - much worse than hunter. They cut off he "thumb" paws on both front legs, she was frighteningly thin, scared and a large part of her left ear was ripped off by the owner's other dogs. I won't even begin to address her psychological problems. Nonetheless, we got her and when I found out I was livid - i mean LIVID. Mainly it was because of the stress of having two dogs- but additionally it was the expenses, inconvenience and overall hassle of having TWO weimaraners (when one is needy enough). I began plotting how long it would take for my dad to realize what an epic mistake he had made and send her away - possibly to my relatives in Spain or wherever - just anywhere away from home! I could not wait until we got rid of her and everytime my dad flipped a shit and beat her senseless (which sadly happens like daily) I kept thinking it would only be a matter of days. Little did I know that I wouldn't stand a chance against her charms when I arrived home for the summer and little did i know that only a month or so later, I wouldn't be able to imagine home without her. Yes, she was - actually still is a monster and she has proven herself to be quite a whore, but she's also family now and undeniable one of the cutest things i've ever seen, even if she is a monster.
My little monster's name is Ashley.

TBC - class is ending so i need to amscray.